Genetic predisposition to my favorite word

The word ‘shit’ is on my family’s Coat of Arms.  It’s a favorite word passed down through generations of my female ancestors.  It only makes sense that it should be the foundation of my vocabulary.  Lots of stuff makes me use it.  For example:

 

Really cute things.  Like unicorns with chainsaws attached to their heads.  Awwwwww shit.

Discovering that I completely lost the ability to bake.  What the shit?

Laughing so hard I collapse on the floor and roll around.  ROFL is REAL.  Ahhhh shit.

Getting turd-bombed by seagulls.  Shit!

Eating a banana, then swelling up like a giant sea slug.  OH SHIT.

Bananas.  I’m bananas about them.  I don’t eat them often anymore because they tend to do funky things to my stomach.  They also make my mouth burn.  I figured it had something to do with the pH of the fruit.  It was late night/early morning and I needed a snack, so I ate a banana.  And then within 20 minutes my tongue and the inside of my mouth started getting tiny white sores, and of course there was burning.  I took a benadryl, then zonked.  When I got out of bed, my eyelids were puffy and swollen, along with my hands and legs.

The day before banana I ate some avocado and got the distinct feeling I had been poisoned.  Nausea, salivation, sweating, rapid heart beat.  That was similar to what happens when I eat flax seed, only with flax I puke my guts out for hours.  Flax is death.  I don’t eat flax anymore.  So, this burning/blistering banana mouth…allergy, or cross reaction?  I eat healthy foods and am punished.  I eat a bag of chips, and am perfectly fine.  I swear, if I develop an allergy to chocolate, my world will end.

HEY BODY!  YOU’RE DUUUUUUMB!

23 thoughts on “Genetic predisposition to my favorite word

    • Hahaha, it’s so true. I looked at the nutritional info on cheese puffs and they have calcium and iron. Good enough, right? 😉

      I have a veg based nutritional shake mix that I’ve been taking that has 100% rda of most stuff, except omegas and iron. Makes me feel a little better about my shit diet. Doesn’t hurt that it tastes like cake batter!

      Liked by 2 people

      • Hmmm cake batter (said in homer Simpson’s voice).
        Cheese puffs are all good, they are light and fluffy so can’t be that bad eh 😂.
        I’m the same , ensure drinks for me, I have the milkshake version and tastes pretty good. Not quite McDonald’s, but the Shit ain’t bad.

        Liked by 1 person

    • Yes! As much as I love this mild weather, I’m so not ready for spring yet. I hear Alaska has been warmer than usual for the past few years though as well. The iditarod race might be shortened this year due to lack of snow. 😦

      Liked by 1 person

    • Blueberries and citrus fruits seem to be okay, but everything else is suspect. I’m having a difficult time with veggies too. So far I’m up to green beans, carrots, and potatoes/yams. It’s definitely progress, even if they aren’t the most nutrient dense.

      Vitamin Cocoa is essential to brain health 😀

      Liked by 2 people

      • John has got me into eating oranges, I don’t think I’ve ever had blueberries. I love raspberries. For years I wasn’t able to eat tomatoes because of my very fair skin I think, I’d get an allergic reaction. Then after living in south Germany for a few years my skin actually tanned in the sun instead of burning and I found I could eat tomatoes.
        Chocolate is definitely good for the brain 🙂 hehe 😀

        Liked by 2 people

  1. I have to wonder, is it the banana or the chemicals on the banana that are causing your allergic reaction?

    http://www.ewg.org/enviroblog/2014/04/bananas

    http://www.whatsonmyfood.org/food.jsp?food=BN

    Sure, they say that the chemicals don’t make it past the peel, but that’s probably because a lot of the chemicals that farmers use are unknown and not revealed through testing, just like with fracking chemicals.

    As your internet doctor, my advice is to only eat chocolate and buttered noodles. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

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