It’s clear I’m having impulse control issues. My parents know not to talk to me until I have been appropriately caffeinated. I’m a Jekyll in the period between waking and actually being awake. I don’t like it, but that’s how it is when I embrace the coffee.
My sister is getting on my nerves. I eat often, and she stares are me for a while. I can see her out of the corner of my eye. I don’t like being watched. Finally she asks what I’m eating. I tell her. She hovers. I want to yell at her. Tell her to get out of my zone, because it’s fucking annoying, but I don’t. I don’t know why it bothers me, but I’m not alone. Mom and Dad seem annoyed at her insistence to know everything that’s going on when she isn’t part of the conversation.
My parents are getting ready to leave for the VA clinic in Cincinnati and Dad is having “problems”. The conversation was between Mom and Dad. Lisa stopped what she was doing, walked back and asked ” what’s the problem? “. Dad huffed and went into the bathroom, Mom told Lisa it was private, of course nicer than I’d be capable of. The girl doesn’t understand social boundaries.
I yelled at her last night when I was snacking on cereal and I could see her staring at me while I was eating. ” It’s fucking cereal!” Maybe not the best way to deal with it, but she stopped staring, so whatever. I feel sort of bad about it. I’m sure if I could just talk to her about my antisocial behavior, and how I (and most people) need their boundaries, she’d fuck off a little, but I don’t think of these things until after an outburst.
Of course, it’ll keep happening until I say something. Like now, she keeps coming in to ask me what I’m doing. Same as the last fucking time you asked. I’m sorry I’m not more exciting, but damn..
Her old roommate of 7 years told my Mother Lisa is a difficult person to live with, and it probably wouldn’t have worked out if they didn’t work opposite shifts. Mom being a mental health person has said she thinks Lisa may have Asperger’s. What does she think is wrong with me? I have bitchy. Ha! Dad is bipolar, and she has post brainfuck anxiety. We’re one fun family.