Spend like a Kara, not like an asshole

I have a limited amount of time to let go of the GRRRRRRRRRRR before my idiot gets home.  Trust me, I’m as tired bitching about him as you are reading about it.

I paid bills this morning, which always throws kerosene on the bonfire.  I’ve been paying one of his FOUR credit cards down since he maxed it out before we moved north.  He didn’t use it at all when he was in Korea because I told him to leave it.  He can’t be trusted and he knows it.  So, ding dong had to get a new laptop for his classes.  Bullshit.  He has a laptop, and if he doesn’t like his, I offered him mine because it’s smaller and doesn’t run as hot.  Why save money when you can spend it?

We got a total of $1,000 from Volkswagen for the emissions settlement on our car.  Half of it was in the form of a dealer card, and the other half was a visa gift card.  I was pretty fucking excited that the 40k service would be free, instead of $900 dollars.  Well, when he scheduled the service appointment, he only had them do the oil change and service the DSG (transmission).  Then he took the $500 that was leftover and put it toward his new laptop.  That money could have been used for something we actually needed, like mental health care!  GROCERIES!  A NEW MATTRESS! A HOUSE CLEANING SERVICE!  LOTS OF CUPCAKES!  Pick one.

Well, fuck.  There I go being all practical again.  Our old counselor suggested he take over paying the bills so he can get slapped in the face by the numbers twice a month, instead of me, but we both decided he’d run us into the ground if he actually knew how much money we have in checking.  I round purchases up, he rounds down because he’s a moron.  Even he’s aware he’s a spendytard.  Needless to say, it’s still my job.  The tax refund is gone because I had to payback savings the money he robbed from it.  No touching savings.  I’m prepared for disaster, because shit happens all of the time.

The last non-essential purchase I made was lizard stuff.  It’s easy to make me happy, and inexpensive to keep me entertained.  I’ve only made it through half of my $3 yarn, and I’m almost done with my rainbow noose…scarf.  When I was a kid, I got hand-me-downs and played with sticks in the mud.  When he was a kid, his parents bought him dirt bikes and cars when he was old enough.  He feels like he’s entitled to stuff.  He’s 35 years old, and he should have something to show for it, but he doesn’t.  You know why?  Because he spends it all on stupid shit.

Love is a fragile thing.  Right now I feel like beating his face with one of his RC cars, or riding a sled of boxes down the stairs and plowing into his nads with my feet when he walks in the front door.

14 thoughts on “Spend like a Kara, not like an asshole

  1. First off sorry gurl for your troubles BUT I CAN’T STOP LAUGHING MY UNHAPPY NOW HAPPY AZZ OFF AT HOW YOU WORD THINGS LMFAO..GURL YOU ARE TO MUCH !! well not really in reality he is toooooooo much… YOU are a strong gurl that is for sure…
    He acts like a spoiled bratt lol..I GO FOR THE CUPCAKES ..YUPPERS THAT WOULD BE IT..CUPCAKES FOR ALL..

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Been there, done that with my first ex-husband. His idea of living within your means was to make the minimum payment on your credit card, allowing it to rack up more and more interest over the years. Hell, one day he’d be a rich scientist, right? Well, he is now, thanks to me putting up with his antics while he finished many years of school. We both graduated with six-figure school loan debt. I paid mine off in two years by working my ass off and living below my means. It took him more than ten years.

    Then there are priorities. Why choose to please the one you supposedly love, when you can be doing something you love more?

    For example, my ex-shithead loves to cook and eat expensive food. On our first wedding anniversary, we cooked “Duck with 40 cloves of garlic.” Now, I grew up like you. To spend $10 on a fucking bird (in the ’80’s) gave me tachycardia, but hey, it was our anniversary, so I bought a bottle of good Champaign to go with the bird.

    The meal was nice, but what I was eagerly anticipating was the “treat” to follow directly after the chocolate cake.

    But the material boy just kept on chomping till he passed out WITH HIS HEAD IN HIS PLATE–seriously, I thought that was just a literary turn of phrase–but no, he was unresponsive, so I went to bed alone and cried myself to sleep. He really didn’t understand why I refused to acknowledge his existence until I got over it and went back into denial.

    I say into you: what do you need?

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Should we send money, guns and lawyers?
    Wouldn’t want to be MC right now. But I do wish I could be a fly on the wall to hear you give it to him Kara style!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. I’m getting sympathy elevated blood pressure. What does it take? My first two live-in boyfriends nearly got us evicted and each time I managed to pull us out, but it forever changed how I interacted with them, and why they are now exes.

    Liked by 1 person

    • If I had a TARDIS, I might go back in time to say ‘no’ instead of ‘maybe’ when he proposed. Haha. It’s not an awful relationship that he and I have, and it’s much better than it used to be, but there’s a ton of room for growth. He’s a little more resistant to change, and it takes him a lot longer to adapt. I love him and hate him simultaneously. I think he needs to get rid of the training wheels (his parents money offerings) to really value what he has, and that living within his means isn’t a bad thing. We’d be living very comfortably right now if I weren’t dumping 2/3 of his income into debt payments.

      Liked by 1 person

      • Raising men is exhausting. Raising men to understand money concepts is exhausting and expensive. When it gets to that point, I always want to send them back to mommy and daddy (and sometimes I do). You have my deepest sympathies.

        Liked by 1 person

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