I have a limited amount of time to let go of the GRRRRRRRRRRR before my idiot gets home. Trust me, I’m as tired bitching about him as you are reading about it.
I paid bills this morning, which always throws kerosene on the bonfire. I’ve been paying one of his FOUR credit cards down since he maxed it out before we moved north. He didn’t use it at all when he was in Korea because I told him to leave it. He can’t be trusted and he knows it. So, ding dong had to get a new laptop for his classes. Bullshit. He has a laptop, and if he doesn’t like his, I offered him mine because it’s smaller and doesn’t run as hot. Why save money when you can spend it?
We got a total of $1,000 from Volkswagen for the emissions settlement on our car. Half of it was in the form of a dealer card, and the other half was a visa gift card. I was pretty fucking excited that the 40k service would be free, instead of $900 dollars. Well, when he scheduled the service appointment, he only had them do the oil change and service the DSG (transmission). Then he took the $500 that was leftover and put it toward his new laptop. That money could have been used for something we actually needed, like mental health care! GROCERIES! A NEW MATTRESS! A HOUSE CLEANING SERVICE! LOTS OF CUPCAKES! Pick one.
Well, fuck. There I go being all practical again. Our old counselor suggested he take over paying the bills so he can get slapped in the face by the numbers twice a month, instead of me, but we both decided he’d run us into the ground if he actually knew how much money we have in checking. I round purchases up, he rounds down because he’s a moron. Even he’s aware he’s a spendytard. Needless to say, it’s still my job. The tax refund is gone because I had to payback savings the money he robbed from it. No touching savings. I’m prepared for disaster, because shit happens all of the time.
The last non-essential purchase I made was lizard stuff. It’s easy to make me happy, and inexpensive to keep me entertained. I’ve only made it through half of my $3 yarn, and I’m almost done with my rainbow noose…scarf. When I was a kid, I got hand-me-downs and played with sticks in the mud. When he was a kid, his parents bought him dirt bikes and cars when he was old enough. He feels like he’s entitled to stuff. He’s 35 years old, and he should have something to show for it, but he doesn’t. You know why? Because he spends it all on stupid shit.
Love is a fragile thing. Right now I feel like beating his face with one of his RC cars, or riding a sled of boxes down the stairs and plowing into his nads with my feet when he walks in the front door.