Day 9: Playin’ With My Balls

Four days ’til MC’s surgery, then I’ll start counting down from 45.  That’s almost 60 days of in-laws.  Ouch.  I think I need a hug (and a gallon of brandy)!

The evil left the house about four hours ago and I hope they stay gone.  I’m making my lists of what to pack and what needs to be taken care of before we leave the house for ten days.  I took a long break from knitting, so I spent some time winding skeins into balls to make them more compact for transport.  My tendonitis is completely healed!  No more pain in my wrists and arms.  I’m hoping to get one more panel done for my blanket while I have nothing better to do besides stare at my drugged husband or out of a hospital window.  Keeping my hands busy is a great way to get all of that excess rage out.  It’s like masturbation, but uh, less messy and more constructive.



Fuzzy balls

I’m bringing nothing but fantasy fiction with me to read.  No medical books, no psychology books, no Shelby Foote Civil War books.  Just pure, delightful fantasy.  A little less reality is always welcome when shit gets too real.

This afternoon I got a notification through my mobile WordPress app.  I’ve got 200 followers!  Cool.  I suspect most of these are ghosts, in which case they should jump out and say “boo!” every once in a while.


I love my blogger pals.  I wrote a really mushy post, presumably while drunk on painkillers, exclaiming how much y’all mean to me, and I appreciate every single darn one of ya’s.  Or something like that.  People come and go in the virtual world, so it’s nice when some of ’em stick around.

It has been a good day and that makes me a happy girl.  I plan to savor it because who knows what tomorrow will bring.


31 thoughts on “Day 9: Playin’ With My Balls

  1. Boo! And omg! I love your yarn. It inspires me to dig back into my crocheting basket. But mostly just hit up the Michael’s yarn section.
    I dunno how you’re surviving the witch and FIL. But I suspect, like I would, it involves pain meds, alcohol, and lots of distraction.
    I just finished My Lady Jane by Cynthia Hand, Brodi Ashton and Jodi Meadows and I really think you’d like it! (If you need fun book inspiration)
    Hugs & booze. And I’m here for you!

    Liked by 1 person

    • I try to avoid craft stores. I can almost hear the checking account scream when I think about adding to my yarn collection.

      I’m avoiding them as much as possible. Hearing her speak grates on my nerves in a most unique and irritating way. I have to share a hotel room with them next week. I’m packing a frickin’ flask.

      Thanks for the recommendation!

      Liked by 2 people

  2. Ahhhh … just soaking in that post …

    60 days?? I missed that original announcement … OMFuck!!
    So this is for you re that headfuck:

    (Hopefully you can see it! if you can’t, its supposed to be a hug lol)

    Masturbation?? Messy?? Woman, what are doing?? LOL … no, never mind, no details please haha

    200 … righteous! πŸ˜‰

    And finally … Your welcome πŸ™‚ Haha

    Enjoy your day xoxo

    Liked by 2 people

        • True. That’s the plan. As soon as he’s outta ICU, I’m there listening to him snore. I probably know most of the nurses on that floor. They’re much nicer than int. Med. so they may even give me a rollaway bed. I’ll sleep on the floor if I have to. Unless he kicks me out….my mouth is a little out of control. πŸ˜‰

          Liked by 1 person

      • Dudes have some disgusting stinks about them. How can this be attractive to potential mates? It’s astonishing that the species has survived. Maybe that’s why some women have evolved with anosmia. They can’t smell the hairy assholes! There is only one thing that disgusts me more than the funk of old semen, and that’s my dog’s anal gland stench. Holy fuck. Eau de decomposing anchovies….retch. She discharges the evil liquid when she’s been chastised for eating my possessions, out of fear of my ranting (let me tell you, I can rant when I find a roll of paper towels shredded into fine pieces on the floor, or worse…). Sometimes they just empty by themselves, which the vet says is normal and healthy. Well and good, but holy fuck, the stench would gag a maggot. Some dudes can be trained to use a tissue to catch their vital fluids, but others get a manly kick out of watching the fountain go splat somewhere. It’s unlikely that those types are trainable to do something as radical as cleaning up the mess. I know you love him, though. The things we do for love….


        • Hahahahaha….oh my. Yeah, anal glands are ripe. I house sat for my parents 2 springs ago and their little 9 pound shih-tzu decided to get a butt infection while they were gone. She was dragging her ass across the carpet, couch, bed, you name it – she smeared it with stank. I eventually filled the tub with warm water and baby shampoo and let her soak. Did the trick, but I had to wash everything in the house. 😷😡

          Liked by 1 person

  3. Haha, one wonders how masturbation is messy, and I’m wondering how it isn’t constructive in an way… especially if you’re full of rage! I guess knitting is a great alternative, though I’d still prefer me some crochet. I haven’t read enough fantasy lately, can’t get into it. Have to delve into the dragon-riders series again or even dig out the Holy trilogy. Too much real going on around everywhere it seems. Now that it’s crunch time and I’m sure tensions are high over there, I hope you guys can get a couple final days of a bit of rest and time together before the big day.

    Liked by 1 person

    • It seems I’m the only person on the planet who gets absolutely nothing out of it, or sex for that matter. I’d much rather stab people than self-service, but knitting will have to do since it’s more legal… although knitting needles are sorta sharp. Hmmm…whoops, tripped and stabbed her in the face. Mybad. I’m a terrible person.

      But seriously, if there’s a god, she needs to drop a piano on harpy. My parents are driving in today and I just know I’m going to cry like they’re dropping me off at daycare for the first time when they leave. “Don’t leave me with these assholes!” πŸ˜†

      Liked by 3 people

      • Honestly I wish I got something from self gratification, to me its like being ticklish…its not the same when it’s yourself but someone else can sure do the job…from what I gather for those who are able to enjoy it, it can have some major pain and anxiety relief bonus’ I feel like I’m missing out πŸ˜›
        It’s funny, a childhood with looney tunes brought me up to believe that pianos falling on people was a much more common occurrence…too bad in it’s not, eh? At least where the harpy is concerned. Maybe you can hope that a stress related case of laryngitis takes her over and at the very least it would be silent death stares and a dry erase board.

        Liked by 2 people

  4. I think men get a lot more out of masturbation than women, mostly because women don’t know how to enjoy it. They think it’s dirty. And men have been doing it since puberty.

    To me, it’s just another bodily function. Of course I’ve read that having an orgasm can help with pain and anxiety, but that hasn’t been my experience. (When I say I’ve tried almost every method to reduce pain, I really mean it.) However, like chocolate, it does feel good. And feeling good is important. πŸ™‚

    Liked by 1 person

    • 3 things can get rid of my pain entirely: 1. Very Loud Rock Music Live: I have experienced this once. I saw Interpol at a small gallery in London and felt nothing for the whole set. 2. Orgasms, if I’m allowed time to enjoy them. 3 Non-Epileptic Seizures – which are quite similar to Orgasms, and used to be called ‘Hysteric Seizures’…. you get the drift.

      Liked by 3 people

      • An orgasm can get rid of your pain entirely? I think that’s amazing. Too bad they don’t last longer. Sometimes, an orgasm can make my head pound more, so I gotta be careful. I guess the only thing that gets rid of my pain entirely is sleep. While I’m asleep (and not dreaming about pain), I’m not in pain. I love sleep. If I could, I would marry sleep. πŸ™‚

        Liked by 1 person

        • Sleep – yeah, that’s some good shit. I slept for 28 hrs once. I’m very lucky in the orgasm stakes, but the getting there can give me a headache – literally – you know, blood flow and all that – makes my ears pound. And I have spinal problems. But, the EDS I have means my skin is very sensitive so… In fact I’m more like the stereotype of men – I even fall asleep straight away after. No cuddling, or conversation, just zzzzzz.

          Liked by 2 people

  5. ‘It’s like masturbation, but uh, less messy and more constructive’ – not the way I knit. What kinda stupid* fiction do you like? – I work in a bookshop. *I don’t consider one kinda fiction more stupid than another. I read Georgette Heyer. There, it’s out. But I mainly read history, biography and plays. But, when I want a holiday from the Bleak Midwinter Reality, I want heroines in pretty dresses.

    Liked by 1 person

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