Change Is Messy



Behold, the poo-headed poo-head


I’m a semi-androgynous girl (call me an IT if you like) who happens to have long hair that I enjoy neglecting.  Shitty, fine, dry, staticky, knotted hair aka the Crap That Hangs Over My Back.  When it gets humid, it turns into an unmanageable poof.  I absolutely despise getting my hair cut.  I mention this every single time I have an impending appointment at a salon.  I have this thing about people touching my head or getting near my eyeballs with a pair of shears…it’s not relaxing.  It makes me go to my mental safe place and thus, I appear to be mute.  A stylist who tries to get me to talk will often give up after ten minutes, then spend the rest of the time glaring at me when she thinks I’m not looking.  I see all.

I was a huge tomboy growing up and it was always a fight to get me in for a haircut.  Now that I’m all “grown up” it’s still a fight.  MC won’t hesitate to tell me that my hair looks like shit.  You know what, dude?  Fuck off.  He gets his head buzzed every two weeks.  At least I butcher my own bangs every once in a while, which is no simple feat for a left-hander.  It saves money, only getting my hair cut once or twice a year.  One day, I’ll quit talking about how much I hate getting my hurr did but who knows when that day will come.  Presumably, after I’ve decided that cueball is a good look for me.  Sinead O’Connor has a nice skull.  Mine is likely very lumpy.  I could always get a relief map tattooed on my hairless scalp.

I’m in need of a change.  The easiest thing to change is my hair so I’m in the process of finding a stylist who doesn’t charge more than $25 (I don’t have much hair even if it is long – $55 is a fucking ripoff), yet gives a halfway decent cut and actually listens to me when I say MINIMAL layering, please.



fuchsia of 2016


After that or possibly before, I’ll be colorful again.  When I do go “wild”, I only do one color at a time.  So far fuchsia and indigo have been it.  I did a little bit of research and found a new brand of dye to try, Joico Intensives.  While I love Manic Panic, I’m lucky if it lasts through two washes.  The new stuff is supposed to last through fifteen washes, so that’ll be about a month of prettiness.  I picked Sapphire Blue, Amethyst Purple and Magenta.


Above are the exact colors of the same brand on pre-lightened hair.  I won’t be doing that, mostly because my skin is very sensitive and also because I’m hopelessly lazy.  My hair is light golden brown so it’ll look more like an oil slick.  See below.


Pretty pretty!  MC has agreed to help me with this, despite his reservations and concern that the bathroom will turn into a bleeding rainbow.  He’s not wrong, this (change) is a very messy process.  Photographic proof coming soon.

20 thoughts on “Change Is Messy

  1. Excited to see how it turns out! I’m about the same – baby fine, part curly/wavy, part straight so I just looks scraggly most the time. Last haircut was 2015… Maybe late fall 2014. Same turd color, but it goes auburn with sun exposure. Yay, Celtic blood.

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  2. I can’t wait to see! I love the photos. If this turns out well for you, maybe I’ll do it! My gray streak would turn a cool color….yeah.
    BTW, I only get my hair cut once or twice a year too. I used to wait, just trim, until I got over 10 inches to donate. Now I have too much gray.

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  3. My Mum used to cut my hair. I’ve had a total of 4 professional hair cuts. I’ve disliked all of them. I’m due another one. I wanted to get it dyed (I have natural grey streaks which are now fashionable…) but I’d developed Psoriasis which has made my scalp and ears like a sticky swamp. I think I’ll get it undercut*. *This means I won’t do it, I’ll just get it cut to my mid neck like last time…. I wish I were brave.

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    • My Mom cut my hair when I was in the same state as her. The cuts I pay for usually turn out worse than when it’s done by my Mom even though she can’t see out of one eye, thanks to her brain aneurysm. My sister has severe psoriasis and she started using some sort of serum on her head, along with taking low dose BC (fucking hormones)…looks quite a bit better. I wish I knew what it’s called, although I’m sure you’ve tried everything. Damn those auto-immune fuckerees.

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      • I’ve been ignoring the swamp head. Now the folds of my ears are affected I’m going to have to do something about it. And my hair is falling out. I’m not going to cut it until I know why it’s falling out so much. There are so many reasons it could be. So. Much. Urgh.

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  4. Can’t wait to see! I will be changing my current purple/green soon (its been over 2 1/2 months and still very THERE) when I finally have energy… but I haven’t decided to what yet. I can give a huge thumbs up to Jerome Russell’s Punky hair color, I’ve always had good results and the baking soda/toothpaste trick always works on any bathroom mess (which there always is) though usualy my frail pasty skin takes a few extra scrubs around the ears and scalp. Good luck, we need photos 😀

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    • Wow, that’s good to know! I think the longevity problem is that I refuse to bleach my hair and of course, the first time I did it, I only left it on for an hour. 8 hours was good for about two weeks with Manic Panic. The stuff I got says to allow to process for 20 minutes under heat (I guess that means blast my head with a hairdryer? BLAH).

      I have no idea how I’m going to do it. It was a good idea and now I’m wondering what order to put the colors in. Should I do my whole head or just streaks? Should my bangs be one color and all colors? I’m making this way more complicated than it has any right to be. 😉


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