Damage Control

Harpy may be gone but that didn’t prevent the drama from spreading to the SW corner of the USA where my parents are vacationing.

The relationship I have with my ‘rents is the complete opposite of what MC has with his.  There’s more mutual trust, respect, and fewer attempts at continued parenting.  That job is done for them and I’m definitely done being parented.  Overall, it’s good.  I went from borderline hating them as a teenager to actually enjoying their company in small (very small) doses as an adult.  When I say them, I mean my Mother.  I still can’t tolerate being around the Troll.  I absorb his anger like a sponge and become a Tazmanian devil.  One of the perks of being an empath.

H’okay, so the future is very uncertain.  It is for everyone, but ours looks particularly stormy.  We have MC’s heart issues and we have my issues with every-damn-thing.  It’s possible that within a year, there will be a lapse in health insurance.  I’ve applied for SSDI already and I’m pretty sure I’ll be eligible for Medicaid (if either of those still exists in a year, no one knows.  Thanks, commander in douche).  Even if all of my contingencies fall into place perfectly, there will still be a period of time in which I’ll be uninsured.  MC will be covered through the VA but since he’s not 100% VA disabled, I’m not eligible for VA benefits, nor would I want to be.

Medications alone will cost a fortune, then there are the appointments, labwork and periodic imaging studies that are required for follow-up care.  I don’t even want to guess how much money gets dumped into my life maintenance each month as I’m sure I’d shit an entire quarry if I knew the dollar amount.

MC’s parents have liquid funds to take care of him and they’re willing to pay out of pocket for just about anything, including a truck repair that costs more than the truck is worth.  The catch is that they do things for him expecting obedience or “coachability” in return.  From my perspective, that’s completely wacky.

My parents are thirteen years post-bankruptcy, thanks to the cost of my Mom’s brain aneurysm so they have limited funds.  They get by and have decided to spend what little excess they have to travel and see the country before they die.  My parents took care of me for two months when I broke my ankle.  I was the nastiest, most miserable ass during those two months yet they knew I was grateful and they didn’t expect anything in return and the same went for the six weeks my Mom spent here this winter.

Harpy thinks my parents are awful because of how hands-off they are.  I think they’re wonderful because of this.  They’re happy to do whatever they can for me, I only need to ask.  Harpy is literally shitting herself because she’s afraid they’re going to get stuck with my medical bills once MC gets discharged (if he does).  She’s not concerned about me in the least.  She’s concerned about MC having to put up with my health shit.

As soon as she got off of the plane, she called my Mother and left a voicemail message saying “You need to go to Maryland and take care of your daughter.”

My Mom heard this as “You need to see Kara immediately because she’s dying.”

I spent all of Sunday evening reassuring her (via text) that I’m “fine”* and told her not to listen to the crazy bitch.  Harpy is just worried about me being a money pit in the future like I’m an old, busted-ass car.  I spoke with Mom on the phone this evening because she hasn’t slept much during the past two days because she said she feels guilty and extremely anxious after speaking with Harpy.

Death by flesh eating amoeba to that woman.  I’ve had it.  My Mom is awesome and anything that makes me a decent person comes directly from her guidance as I was growing up.  Is she perfect?  No.  But no one is.

Addendum: it appears Harpy will still be calling MC every single night.  Tonight she told him I’m taking diet pills.  She saw them sitting on the nightstand next to the rest of my drugs.  Fexofenadine HCl (it’s an antihistamine).  Yeah, man.  I’m such a fatty.  A fatty WITH ALLERGIES. 😆

*Fine is open to interpretation.  Is this fine for someone else?  Probably not.  For me, when compared to two months ago, I’m doing fantastically well.

13 thoughts on “Damage Control

  1. Harpy needs to look in the mirror before she goes judging others. I would be devastated if I believed I made someone feel the way she does with you.

    Liked by 3 people

    • Absolutely, you and me both! Other people aren’t on her radar. I’d almost feel sorry for her knowing most of her own family avoids her, but she’s convinced she’s faultless and I’m way beyond sympathy at this point.

      It took me YEARS to learn not take what she says to heart, even if it still irritates the snot out of me. My Mom hasn’t had as much exposure to the vile beast and she’s just as sensitive as I am so it really messed her up. 😦

      Liked by 2 people

  2. How dare she call your mother! What the hell? I’ve never known anyone who has their head up their son’s ass so far they can’t see reality. Can’t have compassion for anyone else.
    MC can do no wrong. You can do no right. She is not a normal human. Or as least I hope not.
    Being empathetic around someone like that would be torture.
    I hate you and your mother have to deal with crazy lady.

    Liked by 2 people

    • I should have thought about this before I married him, eh? I called his Mom a bitch when I was 14 or 15. Figured I was just a pissed off teenager and I was the problem (because she said so). Hindsight, I was a very good judge of character and was just speaking the truth. I broke up with him because he was completely under her rule, then he found me nine years later. Apparently my IQ dropped as I aged or I would have known better. 😉


  3. Lawd, are you sure we don’t have the same harpy-in-law? Actually, no, I do have the one saving grace that my bitch-in-law doesn’t call my mom. But I would looooove to see her do that. I’m an only child….and my mom is rather protective.
    Double double toil and trouble, please oh please conjure up just 2 small house for dropping on….erm ….just a couple of people.

    Liked by 2 people

  4. Bloody hell … I have only just seen this post … dam WP ! I’ll give it a read and get back to you soon my friend 🙂 … I saw the word ‘Harpy’ arrggghhhh ….

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Hmmm … fuck Harpy. If she ends up paying for your medical bills .. . Sorted 🙂 LOL

    Your Mama sounds cool 🙂 I like the hands off approach too … but my MIL criticises that Me for doing that with my kids. Last time she made a passive aggressive remark to this effect was my town trip … to which I said … ‘How many of your grown babies do you still have at home? And their spawn? And your still complaining about it … Just saying …’. She shut up after that lol.

    Liked by 2 people

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